Wednesday, June 13, 2012

Thank you, River Heights City, Thank you.

You know something, River Heights, you're a pretty great city.  And not just because of Apple Days.  For example:

Remember that day when we getting rid of some of our cement curbing?  And by some I mean a ton (literally).  Remember how we were too cheap/lazy to take it the dump and how Christian broke it into chunks and filled our garbage can?  And then remember how it got full and we had to steal borrow our neighbor's and fill that too?  I'm sure you'll remember me saying something like "Are you sure this is legal?" and Christian shrugging his shoulders and tossing another piece in the can.  You remember that, of course.

And then remember how we forgot about it except that our garage became our new black garbage can since ours was full?  Remember how bad it stunk in there and how I was glad I wasn't pregnant?  And then how this morning when we heard the garbage truck, remember how I hid because I didn't want to get in trouble and how the boys ran outside to watch.  And how I let them because I thought their sweet faces might soften you.  I don't think you'll forget the confused look of the garbage man when his industrial sized garbage truck couldn't lift our garbage can.  And then his look when he got all the way out of the truck walked over and opened the garbage lid.  And how I was hiding in the boys' room watching from the window.  And then how I kept wondering why the garbage truck wasn't moving even though the garbage man got back into his truck.

You'll remember how I had to come out holding Jane and said something really brilliant, something like, "Um...am I in trouble?"  And how the garbage man gave me a stern look and drove off.  I really appreciate you not arresting me, River Heights City.  And sending that nice employee to my house later to explain why you can't actually dispose of 6 billion pounds of concrete in a plastic garbage can.  And thank you for not citing me for stealing someone else's garbage can and filling that one too. 

That really was very generous of you.  But you don't happen to have a dump truck I could borrow, do you?